Love Story

This weekend is my wedding anniversary. 18 years with the lovely Amy. Which is pretty cool.

 

But if I was an honest man- and I like to think I am- it'd be safe to admit that not all 18 years have been blissful bliss, and as a husband, though I haven't failed miserably, like anything in life I have room for improvement.

 

Our marriage is not the kind you read about in a fairy tale or see glorified in a Hollywood romance movie either. It's had its ups and downs, just like any human relationship. We ain't perfect, though Amy's a lot more perfect than me. But thinking back to May 29, 1993, I find it hard to believe we've been together so long. It seems like I just blinked my eyes and here we are. Where did the time go?

 

And, gosh, I was such a dweeb on our wedding day. I couldn't even say "I do", correctly. When asked if I'd take Amy as my wedded wife, though I knew I was supposed to say "I do", I momentarily forgot, panicked and blurted out a bewildered. "Yeah." Fortunately it was enough to make us legal, because a few minutes later, standing under a mild blue sky, dotted with a few cotton ball clouds on a Saturday midday at the Nevada County Fairgrounds, Pastor Sam Floyd pronounced us husband and wife.

 

A lot has happened in the 18 years since that beautiful spring afternoon. Though I swear I don't feel any different, it'd be hard to deny that we both are; in some ways anyways. We're not the wide eyed young couple off to see the world together; instead much of our time and energy is now spent just making our way through the world. Living does that to people. You grow, take a few steps back, evolve, take a few steps forward, regress, etc, etc…

And with no cookie-cutter roadmap stamped out for us when we started, like everybody else, we've just had to find our way. But every year when it comes to thinking about our marriage, our anniversary and our time together, I don't think about all the changes, problems or crises, small and large, that Amy and I have faced over the years.

 

For a few minutes, I like thinking back to the first time I ever laid eyes on her.

I'd just started attending Abundant Life Community Church. Actually I was dragged kicking and screaming, nagged by my often overbearing but well-intentioned Mother. I only did it to get her off my back. But before making a quick get away after the first and (I hoped) only ill-at-ease Sunday, I was coerced by Pastor Sam into attending a singles night the following Friday at his house. Truth be told, I only went because Sam told me Jacque (a girl I'd liked and pursued for quite a while) might be there too. I didn’t go to meet Amy or renew ties with God; I went chasing a skirt.

It was kind of an uncomfortable evening, though, because I barely knew Pastor Sam, and didn’t know any of the other people at all. And the only person I did know and wanted to spend time with- Jacque- wouldn't sit still or stay close long enough to even dabble in some superficial small talk. Sigh. I hated then, and still don't like today, being placed in a group with a bunch of strangers. Church singles strangers, work strangers, strangers in general. It makes my blood pressure soar and I came very close to slipping out that night when nobody was looking. But as the event wore on and Jacque did her best to ignore me, I did happen to notice a different girl sitting on a piano bench in the corner.

 

She didn’t talk much and I'm fairly certain she didn't notice me; I mean, come on- what’s to notice? However, when I glanced at her across the room that night, I knew I was looking at the sweetest girl there. Quiet and shy, like me, Amy Galpin had a real nice smile and pretty eyes. As I checked her out, hopefully without her knowing I was checking her out, I took exceptional notice of her eyes; they were innocent and doe-like. Amy’s brown eyes reflected a soft-hearted, gentle spirit that immediately captivated me.

 

But as the evening dragged on, nothing of substance ever happened with Jacque, and Amy and I didn't say two words to each other. So that first singles night was hardly the stuff of magic. I eventually stopped chasing Jacque when she started chasing after a Grass Valley cop. No way could I compete with a man in a uniform. Still, it took another couple of years-- yes, years—before I'd screw up the courage to even ask Amy out. And after a disastrous first date, there was reasonable doubt about there’d ever be another one.

But I got a second chance and it wasn't long after that, the relationship took. And less than a year later we arrived at our wedding day. So that pretty much brings us up to date; life continues to hurtle along, I'm now a lot older and the world remains cold and harsh. But not nearly as my world B.A (Before Amy). She’s been my anchor, my number one fan, my comfort and my joy. I couldn’t have been any more blessed.

So we observe our anniversary on Sunday, I'll catch a glimpse of Amy and for a few minutes find myself once more basking in the glow of young love and the new life we began together that Saturday in May, now so long ago now. But I won't be seeing my barely 40, though still youthful wife; instead I’ll be looking again at the sweet, serene 19 year-old girl with tender brown eyes who I first saw sitting quietly across the room at a church singles get-together, on that cold November night in 1989. 

Though the love came later, it was the beginning of a beautiful friendship. Happy Anniversary, Babe.